Five Little Words

Last week Sarah @ Cottage Garden Studio posted 'Five Words' in response to another bloggers challenge and said to anyone who wanted to play to email her for five words she'd throw out. I couldn't help myself - I LOVE word games! I'll try to continue the game if you wish to email me for five words.

I received my five words with one being a real bit of a puzzle. Not finding the word in my desk dictionary, I emailed Sarah for clarification with no reply. (that's OK, Sarah and I'm very sorry if I offended you by sending you that link, hon) - waiting gave me more time to think about the OTHER four words and my DEEPEST apologies if I offended you asking you if the def *** I'd found was what you'd meant!) Thanks much for the brain tickle, Sarah!

On to THE Five Words:

1) LOYAL is probably the MOST essential quality of a friend, and a lover. It's a judgement word in my mind - one I use to examine others and decide who to trust and allow myself to pursue intimacy with. You either are or you're not. If I have seen someone be disloyal to members of their family, friends, co-workers, church, community, etc. it's really a struggle to believe or imagine I could expect them to be loyal to me. I'd define it as committed to being kind, generous, respectful, nurturing, encouraging, supportive & honest. My dictionary of synonyms equates it to faithful, true, devoted & constant. Personally the first thing that comes to mind when I read, hear or say the word truly is a good dog or cat, who absent any aspiration to accomplishment or recognition, awards or financial gain isn't vulnerable to temptation to turn away or stray - unless, of course, the temptor smells better. (grin)

2) REMOVED I've always thought of as something that was present taken away or deleted as in the items we discarded last month from my Mom's house or words and phrases I've editted from writings. This word was odd for me to contemplate as I think of it as a rigid word of more permanence. Something removed in my mind is not to be retrieved. I think of having a mole or tumor removed, for instance, or a piece of furniture removed from the house or stains removed from laundry or the carpet rather than the synonyms I found for it of secluded, sequestered, remote & separate. Hmmmmmmm...perhaps some mental adjustment may be required.

3) BALANCE OH! SOOOOOOoooooooooo MANY meanings to choose from and my thoughts keep racing with one another. My brain feels kaleidoscopic as thoughts keep altering on this one word. I think of: artful composition of a room or painting or photograph; the amount left in the checkbook; the ability to stay standing or seated on a precipice or edge; juggling multiple tasks/jobs with ease and grace without neglecting anyone or anything; a life carefully portioned in focus so as to not become obsessed with any one thing or person; nutrition/diet; mental stability. Since receiving my little list of these five words from Sarah, this is probably the word I've given the most thought time to - a not very balanced perspective, but that's the challenge. This word confronts me in a way the others don't because on one hand I feel like I OUGHT to strive for balance but I believe there's happiness to be found in pursuing passion and I haven't ever been able to find balance in life while pursuing passion. When I quilt or write or get involved in a cause or idea or do any of the things I'm passionate about, I find myself neglecting chores and duties necessary for keeping a clean, orderly house and feeding myself and others I'm responsible for. Basic maintenance of self and things doesn't get done. I'll pour all of my resources (time, money, energy) into my passionate pursuit without ever giving a thought to the other obligations I may have for those same resources - often at subsequently painfully huge cost. And when others are critical or even resentful of my passionate abandon I view that disdainfully and find fault with their regimented, orderly, scheduled approach to their lives with their daytimers, lists, strict schedules & super neat organizational cubbyholes for everything. I'd rather lose my balance dancing and laughing with a friend than sit properly in an audience at a concert.

4) HOME is where the heart is - whoever said that was oh, SO wise! Recently I've had the experience of 'going home' to find it isn't 'home' to me anymore. It's where I grew up, where my blood family is but it's not home. Home is the place where your soul is nurtured and grows and flowers and you can rest easy. It's a cozy, contented place where you're wrapped in the warmth of love and anyone looking in can see 'you' through the windows. (future blogs to come on 'HOME')

5) TOOTLE The title character of a kid's book about a TRAIN! One I forgot about totally as it was one I never had in the collection of children's books read over and over and over again to my own kids and I'll tell you why - the optimistic rebel in me didn't like the idea of reading a book to my kids about a campaign for conformity and 'sticking to the tracks'. When I travel I absolutely prefer driving whenever possible for the freedom to roam and not be on a timetable and confined to the straight line from point A to point B. That's part of the reason I've never been able to comprehend tours & cruises as attractive vacations.

***This is the word that stumped me as to Sarah's intent. Having just recently found a Facebook comment of a friend to be a trifle insulting, she clarified her intent using the online Urban Dictionary so I consulted UD for clarification of Sarah's puzzling (to me) word. Uh-oh! Oh no, I don't think so. I was soooooo flabbergasted at the UD definition I emailed Sarah to ask if that was what she meant. (I won't give it space in my blog so look it up for yourself if you're curious and naive like me.) THAT couldn't have been what Sarah meant for me to respond to. (Obviously I'm waaaaay less urban than many it seems) I was subsequently way too intimidated to Yahoo or Google search the word and frustrated that I might not complete my 'game'. But, finally after still not receiving a reply from Sarah to my email I thought to consult Wikipaedia. Oh, HOOOORAY! TA-DA!