Friday, January 29, 2010

I can't tell you...well, maybe I could but you wouldn't believe it. Or, IF I did and YOU did it would have to mean you've been here and made it through - in which case, I NEED to hear YOUR story - desperately.

The past month has been a roller coaster of chaos and tears, disgust, agony and grieving. Where is the happy faced, good humored life of retirees like The Golden Girls and those smiling old women golfing you see in TV commercials and magazine ads? Why didn't MY mother get to be one of THOSE? Instead, she's this cross, cranky, grumpy, mean-spirited (mean as a snake are her own words when she's in a GOOD mood, relatively)OLD woman at the eve of her 75th birthday and I wish every day I could turn my back on her and RUN/FLY back to MY life instead of trying so ineptly to clean up after her. It's sooooooooooooooooo like having a 3 year old again most of the day 'most everyday. When did she give up washing her hands after toileting, I wonder? And how is it she can't understand there's a link to inadequate personal hygiene and subsequent upset bowel/digestive issues? AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

Oh...and I miss MY bed, MY shower, MY kitchen, MY TV and music - ALOT!


Anonymous said...

Happy New Year~~!!!............................................................

joyce said...

too long since I stopped by.
way too long.

This is REALLY hard stuff that you are doing.