OK!
She's back! I may or may not have even been missed the past 2+ months, but I'm back. Back to MY life: to blogging, writing, sewing, creative living, gardening, searching and discovering, learning, stretching and anything else MY life encompasses and produces.
For the past 4 or 5 days I'd been meditating and mulling how and when to 're-emerge' here in Studio Lakeside and hadn't found the 'right' flicker of inspiration until this morning when checking out Jamie Ridler Studios where Jamie issued her weekly prompt for
Wishcasting Wednesday for Wednesday, March 17, 2010 "What Do You Wish To Pay Attention To? Ohhhhh...what a goodie this is!
I knew immediately what I wanted to share in regard to what I wish to pay attention to. I wish with alllllll my heart to pay attention to what does and what does not infuse me with a sense of well being or being well.
While in Ohio my soul was in absolute agony observing my mother and numerous practices that I knew could not and were not contributing to well being for her. Speaking of some of them with her did NOT go well at all and were countered with irate hostility. And speaking of or trying to address conditions that were unsuitable for anyone at all, least of all myself, coming to her aid whether day to day or in a possible emergency situation were, sadly, even LESS well received. Her oft repeated response that she was 'surviving' made me so very sad. I want, wanted, for her to 'thrive', not just survive. And I want it for me too.
Upon my return I have come to realize I thrive on sleeping in my bed with memory foam pad. My body needs LOTS of water, green tea and lemonade - not even an ocassional pop/soda. I can less afford recovery time from just pushing through than time for rest breaks to avert fatigue and/or pain. And I'm still thinking and listing...
1 hour ago
5 comments:
As Sheila wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.
What a tough time all around. I'm glad you're home. I don't have RA, but I have really bad fibro, OA, and other physical issues. I've had to learn the same thing about only pushing myself just so much to try to avoid paying dearly for it later. It's hard when you have been used to a lifetime of taking care of other people and getting done what has to be done no matter what, you know? Not used to putting myself first, I guess. Taking care of myself or listening to my body. I think I got very disconnected from my body, actually--until it very literally took over my life--hehe! Oh--and I also have a memory foam pad on my bed, too, that I need and love. :)
Sounds like, even tho there were some frustrating and sorrowful things going on, you have learned some good things from it. Life always has hard things. I have found that it isn't what happens, but how you live thru them that makes the difference. What positive things you gain from the challenges. You deserve stars and cudos! :):)
Welcome back to blogland! I'm sorry that you've had such a rought time with your mom. I've had some ups and downs with my mom lately too, but not to the degree that you're dealing with. Peace and blessings to you as you try to find a way to move on.
I'm glad for you to be back to your own bed. Your own home. I hope too, that your own life of intention is restful and rewarding.
As Sheila wishes for herself, so I wish for her also. It sounds like you have a great handle on what your body needs. May you continue to be healthy and happy.
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